Da Jalopies

"Da ladz wot drive da Jalopies 'ave sum funny ideas about usin' new teknolurgy. Dey calls it 'Da Wheel'. No respekt for tradishun."

Da Streaky Wheelz

"Da ladz paint two stripes on da boarz, cos it reminds dem of streaky bacon. It's also called lean back bacon, 'cept when dey lean back, dey falls out of da chariot! Hur hur hur."

"Also, da parallel lines iz symbolic of infinity in Projective Geometry. Waaagh!"

Piggy Ho!

Savage orc chariot number one is finished.



The basic model was a good one that made it a lot of fun to paint. The plastic had some nice wood grain detailing that held the Brown Ink well (the last of my faithful pot - I'll have to trawl the alternatives. Shading is all very well, but you can't beat ink for getting into the grooves).

The main challenge was finding enough variations on brown to make it look like lots of different types of timer were slapped together in its construction. The boars were Mournfang Brown (I think that's what they call Bestial Brown these days), with Tallern Sand for the light wood and Rhinox Hide for the dark.

The main chassis was painted Vermin Fur, which gives it a nice mahogany colour. I wanted the chariot to had a reddish colour, because as every good Ork knows...

"Red Ones Go Fasta!"

I was wary about choosing a 'boring' colour like Bestial Brown for the boars - since I'll probably be following the lead for my Boar Boyz. But they were livened up a bit with some brown washing, then highlights of Tallern Sand and Bleached Bone.

It's probably right that they don't take away too much attention from the machine - I certainly wasn't going to give them piggy-pink faces, like the box art suggests.

The one on the left may look vicious, but he can herd sheep like you won't believe.

The two charioteers were obviously painted before being added to the war machine. Only one of them is a proper conversion, the other is just a regular orc who's along for the ride.

Strange ... take away the chariot and the whip just looks weird.

Assembling it all when painted - as Kraken also experienced - was no fun at all. But that was my own look-out, since I was following my own instructions. My biggest surprise was how flimsy the connection is between the new style plastic boars and their base - only a single point of contact (compare the rock-solid parallel bars of the old ones). It's very tempting to handle the chariot by the boar yoke, which is actually its weakest point.

Trot on, trotters.

Da Smokey Wheelz

"Da ladz paint flames on da boarz, cos it puts fear into da 'earts of da enemies. And is da favourite flavour of crisps."

"Also, da flames iz symbolic of da Heraclitic philosophy of Eternal Change. Waaagh!"

And, having no time to waste, savage orc chariot number two is also finished.

Arrows of Desire not included.

After sticking fairly close to the plan with the first one, this had more conversion work. Basically chucking a lot more skulls at it, including the yoke. The ridiculously over-detailed banner pole (why is there a snake on it?) comes from the new Savage Boar Boyz kit.

If the two orcs, four tusks, central spike, pair of scythes, impact hits and massive spear don't work, we'll throw the snake at them.

One conversion that I'd have liked to make more prominent was the central spear of the chariot half. Both versions had metal blades that I removed and replaced with Boar Boyz spear tips - flint for one, tusks for another. They look good, but I should have made them poke out further, as they get a bit lost between the big boars.

The 'Tusker Charge' rule suddenly makes sense.

Same colour scheme as before, as I've got a whole army to match up. Different tattoos, as always, and these ones have some nice flame effects. It works better in theory, since the plastic boars are really difficult to do any freehand on. I think I made a better job of of the fire on the charioteers.

As you can tell from the condition of his pants, the one on the left rarely tells the truth.

So that's the mobile element of my army done. Took a while, but it was a nice change from rank and file.

Most of the painting was done to the soundtrack of 'Gladiator'