Offboot 9 - The Dice Strike Back

I haven't kept a close track of how many Offboots there have been. But I do know it was high time I took part in one. After all, no point in having a chaos army if it doesn't go a-chaosing. 

This is what you get if you look for images of Offboot on Google.

I managed to take advantage of a paid work trip to steal a march up to MK, home of the Woff and Off Boots, and challenge the mighty hoards of General Kasfunatu to a swift 1600 point bout. Once we'd eaten a pleasant but dubious curry, partaken of the delights of Egyptian Laser Chess and soaked in the hot tub for three hours, anyway. Not that swift, really.

Warriors of Chaos

I immediately forfeit any claim to be using my own army. Ryanair baggage restrictions just couldn't hack a tub of minis, the cheap sods. Luckily, Kas has all the chaos troops you could possibly imagine, so I put together a list very unlike what I actually own. 

Demon Prince of Khorne (Acid blood, firebreath, wings)

Exalted BSB (horse, banner of improved battle results, shield)

Chaos Horseror (level one lore of Death, horse)

10 Horse Marauders

10 Horse Marauders

5 Knights (ensorcelled weapons)

1 Slaughterbrute (linked to the DP)

1 Chariot (the only Counts As model, played by a warshrine)

So it's a mobility-themed army, the very opposite of my massy blocks of troops back home. 

Vampire Counts

Kas had a number of premade armies, and having helped me build mine up, randomly rolled to see which one he got. I breathed a sigh of relief when he didn't score the Ogres, but it turned into a fatalistic groan when he drew this lot instead: - 

Vampire General (level three, relatively killy upgrades that include reducing enemy leadership)

Vampire BSB (comparatively naked Vampire with banner of better battle resolution)

2 Banshees (to take advantage of that reduced leadership)

28 Ghouls (to carry the Vampires around in)

5 Hexwraiths

5 More Hexwraiths

Another 5 Sodding Hexwraiths

Well goody. Goody goody gumdrops. Gummy gummy hexwraiths. Bah. I have precisely two units that can hurt them, maybe three if the wizard gets some missiles. This should be unpleasant.

Anniversary Gift

Last weekend was the 3rd Anniversary for Mrs Stylus and myself. According to Ancient Lore (wikipedia), the third year is the Leather Anniversary, so it would be normal to expect some kind of belt, or wallet, as my anniversary gift...

... but seriously, what use is a belt or a wallet?

That's about as close to gaming as I get these days, but I'm hoping for a 'Woffnaissance' (or perhaps a 'Re-Boot') in the new year.

Code Magpie

This weekend I partook in a 40k version of a WoffBoot arranged by Reinbowarrior.

My army of choice was Daemons, still reeling from the unlikely generosity of GW by allowing to have two armies for the price of one, I was determined to get some additional use from them.

I had, prior to the weekend, played 4 games of 40k in its current incarnation. Prior to that I remember a couple of games on the floor of Amen court with Kraken, which must make it about six or seven years ago!

My first game, I had been leant Reinbowarrior’s elite Terminator only deathwing – they beat his own Tyranid force.  For my second game, I took a large contingent of my own Nurgle forces and took down the Dark Angels showing them a beating they had never seen before (I had a lucky storm of chaos roll which made the librarian’s head explode, and a herald of knorne taking his place, in turn one). My third game was an abysmal offering from Tzeentch against ‘nids. I setup badly, misplayed the rules for combat and powers (both to my deficit) and got utterly trounced. Finally I took Khorne, and once my units had deep struck in had done enough damage for Reinbowarrior to concede the game (although time also played a part)….  So having won 3 of 4 games (or 2 of 3 with daemons) I was feeling buoyed for the campaign.

Double the tentacles, quarter the price

Wibble wibble.

Okay, I didn't actually count all the tentacles. But I'm sure I'm giving the official Mutalith Vortex Beast a run for its money. I'm helped in this by the twin facts that it can't run, being a model, and it costs far too much.

A Game of Cards

Winter is Trumps

General Kas was over for a few days last weekend. And so began a new era in the dark tales of our mutual nerdery, once I'd introduced him to the local Science Fiction Bookshop. It has an epic level basement full of comics, movies, GW products and FF board games.

Of course, we got carried away.

Woooo! Board games!

Despite calling itself George R. R. Martin's A Game of Thrones The Card Game, I suspect he did very little to develop it. Other than write all the fluff, I suppose.

Miscing in Action

Been a while! Only a year ago, this blog thrummed with the preparations for the summer Woffboot. How the times change with the size of our families.

The gorgeous summer weather in Sweden inspired me, as it always does, to stay indoors with my back hunched over a stifling table of paints. Besides, I felt I couldn't let August go by without some painty blogging.

With no particular project on my mind at present, I did a round-up of random models from the many cupboards and bags of my collection, and came up with a very assorted bunch of models.


Things you don't expect your wife to say No. 1

"Oh, you've finally painted that eagle I bought you."

To which the only possible rejoinder is "Actually, *nerdy snort*, I think you'll find that's a warhawk, *snork snork*."

Some joker killed its parents, now it's a masked vigilante.

For now, I've left the rider off, because I don't like the model very much. I mean, he's held on by vines? That magically grow on the back of the hawk? Really, it's scarcely plausible. I can't paint something that breaks my suspension of disbelief so casually. Plus I can't find the head in my bits box.


Golden Oldie

Nice Beaver Man

Bonus points if you know exactly what it's meant to be. I don't. Some kind of centaur otter, maybe? An Ottaur, if you will. A Ral Partha piece from the mid-80s, I believe, this and its two sword-wielding brethren were my brother's.

A Song of Tea and Sushi 4 - A Dance of Daimyos

It Checks Out

After the last battle, Clan Hatano immediately offers peace. So do my old foes the Hatakayama, who have never bothered to try and reclaim the territory I stole from them. And then a few other clans unexpectedly cave in to my wearily repeated trade offers. I've proved my worth as an opponent, the other clans are starting to take me seriously, maybe. Or they're bored, or perhaps desperate for cash themselves.

My stealth bastard fleet is already on its way by this time.

A Song of Tea and Sushi 3 - A Klash of Katanas

All Alone in Feudal Japan

Tactical analysis suggests I'm going to lose in the long run. Tom has secured a powerful base to the extreme West, out of my reach. Nobody I can get on the diplomacy phone will listen to my offers of coin or military aid to attack him. Nor will anyone consider being my pal. I can probably hold tight where I am, I'm a wily enough general and still have some fairly experienced and powerful armies that can hold what I've taken so far. But I'm not going to get any further without cash.

So my plan is to put all my eggs in one basket, and let tactical analysis go and suck on them.

Like this, but with bow-armed fanatics. 

The scout ship that's been looking over General Hunt's Otomo forces has shown me one critical weakness. His capital province, Bungo, isn't on any of his front lines. It looks like he's spent all his cash on large armies, rather than investing heavily in infrastructure like I have. Bungo is held only by a pretty basic castle and a couple of units of Ashigaru spearmen.

If I stop any attempts at expansion back home and cull my two armies down to two smallish defence forces, I can put together a decent invasion force full of elite monks. Led by my Shogun and a decent-sized fleet, I may just be able to launch a cowardly surprise attack and take that one crucial province from my rival.

It's a long shot, but it just might work.