The WoffBoot Chronicles: Savage Orcs

Savage Orcs

"No other folk make such a trampling... It seems their delight to slash and beat down growing things that are not even in their way."

The Riders of Rohan, The Two Towers

We iz old skool!

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Points: 2,500
General: Stylus
WoffBoots: VII, VIII

Battles: Won 3 / Drew 2 / Lost 8

Da Paleolithic Waaagh!

Bonekrunk Stonesplitter - Warboss

"Da Warboss of all da Paleolithic Waaagh! iz Bonekrunk Stonesplitter. 'Ee got to be top orc when 'ee krunked all 'is rivals wiv 'is bone club. And 'ee got to stay top orc when 'ee split all 'is enemies wiv 'is stone axe."

Skullfink da Arkane - Great Shaman

"Skullfink da Arkane is da prophet of da Paleolithic Waaagh! When 'ee finks deep and profound fings, da powers of Gork (or possibly Mork) flow through 'is noggin, and come out through 'is peepers."

Noggchoppa - Battle Standard

Savage Orc army - Battle Standard Bearer

"Noggchoppa is da champion of da Palaeolithic Waaagh! 'Ee krumped da mighty giant Nogg, den chopped off 'is 'ead to stick on da pole for all the ladz to see. It drips on 'im a lot."

Rokhamma - Big Boss

"Rokhamma is da Big Boss of da Waaagh! and acts as Bonekrunk's ~~lefftenant lootenant~~ flunky. 'Ee 'as da most warpaint of da whole tribe, 'cos 'ee iz a flash git."

Bigtrotta - Big Boss on boar

"Bigtrotta is da Big Boss of all da gruntas and snortas. Da nomadic Waaagh! was ~~subdoogated subjewgated~~ krumped by Bonekrunk and now 'ee 'iz in charge of anyfink wiv a curly tail. As a consolation, 'iz 'at is proper flash."

Ramgut - Shaman

"Shaman Ramgut is da voice of da Big Waaagh! 'Ee can call forth da mighty powers of Gork (or possibly Mork). 'Ee also makes a fantastic mutton vindaloo."

Pigwaaagh - Shaman on boar

"Shaman Pigwaaagh is da uvver voice of da Big Waaagh! 'Ee rides around on 'iz trusty grunta, Snowdrop, and calls forth da mighty powers of Gork (or possibly Mork), as long as dere ain't no dangerous terrain to cross."

Da Bone 'Eadz - Big 'Uns

"Da biggest an’ meanest Orcses. Dey fights wiv extra choppas to get in sum proper crumpin'. No uvver mob is as ’ard as da Bone 'Eadz."

Da Brave 'Arts - Boyz

"Dem Orcses is da backbone of the Waaagh!. Dey gets in a big solid mob and fights wiv spear and shield and choppa."

Da 'Awk Eyes - Arrer Boyz

"Da sneakiest Orcses wiv da keenest senses, Da 'Awk Eyes stalk da grassland beasts and fills dem full of arrers. Dakka dakka dakka!"

Da 'Am Fists - Boar Boyz

"Da fastest and da smelliest Orcses. Dey rides about wiv da pork choppas, in one big rack, or two streaky rashers."

Da Streaky Wheelz - Boar Chariot

"Da ladz paint two stripes on da boarz, cos it reminds dem of streaky bacon. It's also called lean back bacon, 'cept when dey lean back, dey falls out of da chariot! Hur hur hur."

Da Smokey Wheelz - Boar Chariot

"Da ladz paint flames on da boarz, cos it puts fear into da 'earts of da enemies. And iz da ladz' favourite flavour of crisps."

Da Dry Gulchas - River Trolls

"Da ladz found dese trolls chewing fish bones by a dead river. Bonekrunk offered dem all the elves dey could eat, and all the stunties dey could puke on."

Busta, Da Big Green - Giant

"Busta iz Da Big Green. 'Ee prayed to Gork (or possibly Mork) to make 'im da bestest of all da orcs, an' when 'ee woke up, 'ee was da biggest. 'Cos biggest means bestest, dunnit."

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